Shit for brains.

Wow, I haven't put any time or effort into a blog in a good minute, I figure I may as well.
First off let me say - FUCK. As of yesterday I am bikeless which in turn means I'm also heartless. Me knowing not very well what I'm doing tried putting a new length of chain on my bike (using an archaic chain tool) and ended up majorly fucking everything up (long story short). But, staying posi, I'll just wait it out until I can get what I need to solve the problem. For now though, I'm on foot or in vehicle, although I think I'm really enjoying on foot. My days have been as uneventful as ever, although there's a few things (personal) that have lifted my spirits a bit lately. Perhaps it's only temporary but it's quite nice. I've been more focused on school too, which I guess is kind of odd - but a good thing, nonetheless. The better I do now the better it pays off in the end, or so they say. But they also say a lot of bullshit.

Music wise, I've been listening to a lot of The Ergs, which is strange because I never really got into pop punk that much until now. Another new favorite is Union Of Uranus - because I'm a sucker for bands along the lines of His Hero Is Gone and the like. I believe that they may even have a member or two of HHIG, but I could be wrong. Either way, good shit, definitely worth checking out.

Blahblahblah. Not much more to say at this point...or at least if there is it's escaping me right now.

Later.

I

I drink too much coffee.
I talk too much.
I spend too much time being lazy.
I don't work hard enough.
I have good intentions.
I am not as dumb as you look.
I don't like people.
I love everyone.
I spend too much time at the computer.
I don't voice my opinions enough.
I am losing my mind.
I don't know what the hell I am doing.

...

No more exams.

Finally. Which means today was the end of the first semester of my Junior year. Yay. I don't have many friends at school - but here's a few pictures with the few I do have...and today in general...

More thoughts.

Today was the definition of gloom. Rainy, cold, dark - no complaints of course...but it could have been a bit nicer out. I didn't ride my bike to school today, which meant I was aching to ride by the time I got home. On my cold, slightly lonely ride through downtown I came to notice a few things - Orlando is quickly getting that gross "big city" feeling that so many of us despise. More buildings, more shops, more restaurants, more everything - and it's not a good thing. Sure, convenience is nice, but hardly worth the cost. I miss walking to Lake Eola when I was little not seeing the giant courthouse, or not seeing the peoples' million dollar cars parked up and down the side of every street. Oh well.

More on the bike ride.

I took my usual "I'm bored and kinda stressed so I'm biking" route - up Summerlin and down Central and then pretty much whatever way I feel like taking back home...usually back down Church until I get onto Summerlin again, and blah blah blah. I also made a point to get some coffee from Panera - because I never buy coffee, but now I remember why, because they just don't make it like I do at home. Whatever. I then walked my bike around Lake Eola and once again observed the looming buildings and black clouds over the city. Not pleasant.

And now I'm back home.

Not looking forward to too much else, save for tomorrow and Friday. Tomorrow - Food Not Bombs. Friday - Sushi Hatsu (now a Friday night tradition, I suppose), and camping. In my backyard. Again.

Yay.

Today's playlist: Skaven, No Comment, Disrupt

Dismebix!!!!!!!!!!!!

Having a brother well versed in photoshop pays off often:That is all.

Paranoia Secured.

Today's dreary overcast had an effect on my mood and thinking for the most part. Usually I love weather like this, but today I couldn't help but be irritable and slightly grumpy, unlike usual. At school, however, I managed to stay as friendly as I usually try to be, despite the weather...and exams. However, when my dad picked me up, as he always does (even though I have no problem biking back from school, seeing as I bike there in the morning...), I came to realize a few things about my family, such as - none of us really pay attention to the other. Yes, my brother and I are probably a lot closer than my brother and my mom, or me and my dad, or vice versa, but the general matter is that for whatever reason we can't seem to function in conversation. My dad asks a lot of questions, all of which he probably already knows the answer to, and my brother and I always tell each other things that both parents pretend to take an interest in. It's both amusing and slightly depressing at the same time, and at times a bit bothersome. But whatever. I do appreciate any parent's interest (even if false) in their kid's life rather than condeming it. Aside from that, today just felt very sad in general. I can't really put my finger on it, but I think that something is getting to me. Or someone. Who knows. I'm really not the best at identifying my own problems. Whatever it is, I'll get over it soon enough.

In other news, as silly as this picture is, I appear to be able to defy the laws of gravity:

Sweet.

Currently downloading: Stormcrow - Enslaved In Darkness
Currently listening to: No Comment
Currently eating: Saltines
Currently wanting: A new bike.

Today's playlist:

Variety is the spice of life.

Good day, so posi.

Before now.

I remember hanging out with people who I hardly care about at all anymore, and some who I still care about a lot but don't care about me. I don't miss being immature and foolish, but I do miss the good times.

Let's go a couple years back...

My school is a prison.

Even more so than and school already was. Today a new fence system of sorts was finally implemented to keep track of kids while they eat their lunch - always being watched by administrators for "our safety". It's ridiculous. They wonder why the dropout rate is so high and my only guess is that it's just going to get higher as they force their new rules. If I hadn't mentioned it before, the Friday that my school (Edgewater High School) was released for Winter Break, there was 10+ fights throughout the day and at least four guns brought to school, initiating four hour lockdown. However, a call to parents from the school principal assured parents of a total of four fights and one box cutter brought - which is obviously a straight up lie. As well, the principal, who will remain unnamed for now, apparently reprimanded the teachers for letting students use their cell phones to call their parents to come pick them, despite the school's recently implemented "no electronics" policy. In my opinion, the first thing that should have been done by every student should have been to call their parents to make them aware of the situation, and I commend every teacher who supported that idea. But we basically have here is a school principal who is more concerned with his image as a public figure than the safety of students at his school. He is a warden, and the school is quickly becoming his prison. And I'm aware many high school students will complain about school, but I do actually see something very wrong here. I hope that someone is on the same page as me as far as this goes, because I have a year and a half left at this school and I don't want it to be miserable for me, or anybody. I hope there's something that can be done.

I want a tail.

I love the Japanese.

Overall,

I enjoyed my Winter break. No rest for 2 weeks.
Finally, what I wanted.

Strangely enough, I cannot seem to find myself able to fall asleep right now. Maybe I'm anxious or maybe I've just had too much coffee, which I often do. Today, like any Sunday, was rather uneventful, albeit more eventful than a usual Sunday. I managed to feel like a total douche by going to the Mall At Millenia - just being there makes me feel gross - with my mom, who insisted on buying me new pants. I suppose I was grateful, although I really didn't feel the need for any pair other than the pair I always wear. Whatever. I also seem to have contracted a terrible cold that followed me and tortured my nostrils all day, until the past few hours or so. I hate being sick.
I rode my bike around downtown a bit with no real destination, and took a lonely evening walk around Lake Eola. It was quite nice, nonetheless, having some time to myself. Anyhow, I go back to school tomorrow morning. And it looks like I WON'T be going to Miami next weekend. Fuck. Oh well.